Can’t Contour, Will Wing!

I think I am growing up!?! I have reached that stage in my life where I am looking at labels on products that say, firming, age defence, (not too fussed about the wrinkle side of ageing but don’t want my skin to sag or look drab – still hankering after my youthful glow!) and wondering if that will be the product for me. I’m going to try to be true to one brand for a significant time to see if there are any benefits to be found.


I’m at an age now, where make up is my friend! Since the age of 15 I have always worn my black eyeliner; I remember the day I first put it on! I felt awesome! Like Curt Cobain would defo pick me for a backing singer! My eyeliner is my absolute ‘go-to’ make up item, without it I think I look ill! You know the look, flu for a week, baggy eyes, and pasty skin – but as soon as I put my eyeliner on I feel awake and presentable! Now I have ‘grown up’ and I moisturise regularly, I can actually see a vast improvement when I put on my (actually very little) beauty products.


I’ve seen many a You Tube Make Up tutorial about Mums and their morning make up routine and to be honest it may seem simple and minimal to them but to me there is just not enough time for all that nonsense! One I saw was a quick make up application – the word quick was in the title. Now for her it may be quick and she did look utterly fab at the end of it, but to me that was about as much make up as I would wear for a performance on stage! Moisturiser, primer, concealer, foundation, powder, bronzer, dust the blusher, eyelid primer, eye shadow, eyebrow pencil, mascara, eyeliner, winged….(I’ll come to this beauty in a mo!), lip primer, lipstick, then all finished off with some little face spray thingy to make everything stick in place! There was even a bit of contouring in there too!


Right, so this is my daily make up routine:-

  • Moisturise
  • Powder (sticks to moisturiser – that’s my primer right there folks #lifehack!)
  • Bronzer (if I remember!)
  • Mascara
  • Eyeliner– always! If there is only time for one item of makeup then this is it!
  • Blush (if I remember!)
  • Bedtime – One make up remover wipe to clear off what little has managed to hang on in there after Bubs has vomited, sneezed, licked, wiped, snorted, huffed, rolled on and snuggled into, and the bottle steriliser has billowed its steam into my face! (Home Spa and bottle steriliser in one!


I feel that maybe at this stage of my life I need to master this? But, hang on minot grigio! Do I really WANT to learn to do this, or am I being made to feel as though I SHOULD learn to do this; that it will in some bizarre way enhance my life and increase my self esteem; that if I don’t then I will stick out like a sore thumb whilst waiting in the queue at Sainsburys? Well if there is anything more likely to reduce my self esteem it is me trying and epically failing to, in anyway shape or form, master contouring. I ended up looking like one of those women on a Nip & Tuck programme all marked up with thick marker pen lines. I stood back from the mirror. What a laugh! What a joke!

Conclusion – I cannot contour and I’m ok with it! I really do not want to look like a wannabe Kardashian.


Last week whilst mooching about Youtube I stumbled across a new technique craze in make-up application!…


If you are anything like me this word immediately conjured up images of the annual pantomime and the scene where there is a car chase, policeman brandishing a truncheon and the loveable underdog character Buttons or suchlike, running about the stage with the strobe lighting making it all feel a bit surreal, whacky and robotic stop-starty! Turns out that in actual fact this Strobing technique is what we used to call highlighting.  Not so scary after all and something that I can handle without too much hilarity (or irritation!)


Winged Eyeliner

Right. The nemesis of my make up application. I am determined to crack this bad boy! Up until now I have tried every eyeliner and technique out there, felt tip ended, chisel ended, fat, thin, cat eye, liquid, gel, dot method, credit card method…blah de blah de BLAH!


I love my eyeliner and I love Audrey Hepburn and I would love for my eyeliner to mirror her iconic look. I am driven, I am motivated, and I am full of perseverance!  I have now found a magnificent eyeliner to achieve this exact look… It still takes me a few go’s but I get there!





I have recently decided that my skin would benefit from some regular skincare routine and have invested in a Serum from No7. This is lush! I shall also be branching out into the rest of the range of moisturiser for day and night. The main reason I plumped for this product?…the TV advert with the ballerina; a dancer in the present dancing with a projection of her much younger self. I’m sold!!! Just add pointe shoes to any advertising campaign and I’m there!! It’s the most I have ever paid for a moisturiser but I am at an age where I think that I am allowed to indulge myself in this way!



I have an epic Girl’s Night Out coming up in August – Bean has landed an a-ma-zing new job and it will mean that she will have to relocate. I am keen to display my new found/old fashioned strobing/highlighting technique, winged eyeliner look and serumed-up dewy faced look on this night


….although I’m not sure why because after Bean has insisted that we do tequilas…

  1. a) it will be smudged into sexy (HA! Yeah right!) panda look
  2. b) I will be so squiffy that I won’t be able to see it let alone attempt a re-application!
  3. c) Bean, Charlie’s Mum, Sparkle Mum and Peace Mama will also be so sozzled that they won’t be able to focus on it and appreciate the effort I have gone to – there’s a chance that Bean will be sloshed before we even go out! (Love. Her!)
  4. d) my pores will be cleansed with alcohol but it will still take a pack of cleansing wipes to remove that amount of product at the end of the night!
  5. e) we will be in a dimly lit (atmospherically lit) cocktail bar so really who’s to know?!

So in conclusion, I may venture down the foundation route, I will wear my Smokey eye look and I shall Wing away!

But I’d like to make it clear that this is only for very special occasions! I am more than happy to maintain my ‘stick powder on top of moisturiser look’, and eyeliner routine! It’s working just fine for me….and I got ID’d for my lottery ticket the other week too so I can’t be ageing too badly!!!


So, like me with my one item of ‘Can’t live without’ makeup…..what’s yours?! Remember, only one item!


Or, maybe we don’t need any at all?

The Aloha Mummy 🌸



Diary of an imperfect mum



16 thoughts on “Can’t Contour, Will Wing!

  1. Fridgesays says:

    I have a illuminator and I use this under my eyes and (sorry) contour on my cheek bones. Sometimes under my eye brows. In my thirties I have good skin so try not to always slap too much on. I just like to highlight the positive 🙂
    Bronzer would be a close second….hmmm food for thought. If you have a friend that can contour I recommend it for a night out, but not everyday

    Liked by 1 person

    • thealohamummy says:

      Yes an illuminator is a great one! Like you I’m in my 30’s so trying to look after it! I once got my friend to Wing my eyeliner for me before I was confident at it…but we were on the train into town for the night! It wasn’t the classiest of looks in all honesty!!
      Thanks so much for you fab comment!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. laughing mum says:

    haha… oh Im useless at make up! I really wish I could do it better but I just can’t be arsed for the you tube tutorials.. although saying that, the preteen has an app that shows you what you ‘could’ look like with contouring .. It has made me want to learn because THAT laughing mum looked ah-maz-ing!!! but oh…… I can’t be bothered!! Moisturiser has always been my friend, I might just make it my best friend lol – good post! #coolmumclub

    Liked by 1 person

    • thealohamummy says:

      Ha! Totally with the can’t be bothered brigade! Would I rather spend time colouring in my face or having a quick power nap (which is probably better for my skin really…beauty sleep ‘n all that jazz!)
      Thanks for you fab comment! #coolmumclub


  3. turningupindevon says:

    My blusher crayon type stick! But can I have mascara too? Without both I fear the horses will be frightened! (probably why there is so much dung outside our house). I also like my clarins bb cream which I ‘water’ down even more with face cream cos I don’t like the plaster of paris look. Also I am a total SLAVE to my eyeliner and like to wing it too. I saw Kurt Cobain at Reading Fest many years ago in my eyeliner but unforts he didn’t notice me!! I’m going to keep winging it too! #stayclassymama

    Liked by 1 person

    • thealohamummy says:

      Well we mustn’t frighten those horses must we!!🐎 must admit I’ve just found maybelline baby skin anti fatigue instant blur…. That’s a bit of genius right there! Just wish it was in a bigger tube! #stayclassymama


  4. mummuddlingthrough says:

    Love this…I have two make up styles…the going out look, and none. Which either means I’m incredibly naturally beautiful and don’t need it daily, or I am resigned to look like shite.
    That said, I’m not a total failure when it comes to the contents of my make up bag…watch this space for a blog post in draft!
    My one item would probs be mascara…accentuating the eyes, for me it’s ALL ABOUT THE EYES! x

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Kelly Edwards says:

    If I could only use one thing… it’d probably be foundation… hides a multitude of sins and I’ve recently discovered putting it on with a brush. As well as making me feel like a pro (okay, it was only a cheapy from superdrugs), it means my fingernails don’t get that horrible brown tinge from using my fingers – yuck. I’ve started wearing considerably more makeup since having my daughter: Foundation, powder, bronzer, blush (sometimes), eyeshadow (nearly always), eyeliner – I’m still really pants at it but am only wearing it today and mascara…. oh and a bit of vasoline. Actually, maybe that’s my must have item. Can’t have dry lips, love a bit of vasoline! #stayclassymama

    Liked by 1 person

    • thealohamummy says:

      Ah vasoline the unsung hero!!! Yes! I don’t quite get the foundation application with brushes yet…still using me little sponges!! I must do better! *seeks out foundation applied with brush tutorial!! x #stayclassymama


  6. Mouse, Moo and Me Too says:

    Oh this is such a good read! If I could learn any skill in the whole wide world it would be wingy eyeliner. I try so hard. Really need to get it down pat now before my wrinkles swallow up all the ink! #ablogginggoodtime

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Mummy in a TuTu (@mummyinatutu) says:

    I love the fact that I look at lables makes me a bit of a grown up-awesome I thought I was years away yet! I think I do a pretty decent job with my make up when I choose to wear it but I do not know any of the tricks like wings and contouring… I am just a regular old whack it on girl and I really do need to remember to moisturise more regularly… ofc time to take care of myself would be nice lol!!

    Thanks for linking to #ablogginggoodtime xx

    Liked by 1 person

  8. The Mum Project says:

    I feel the exact same way about eye liner. When I don’t have it on I look very tired and sick. I like the idea of putting powder on after moisturizer. I’ve been doing moisturizer and then foundation on top of it which may be blocking up my pores. I think contouring is a thing we are made to feel we SHOULD be doing, screw that, let’s be ourselves and stop trying to mimick the models in magazines that are photoshopped to death and giving us a false ideal of beauty. Thanks for the tips and sharing with #StayClassyMama!

    Liked by 1 person

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